Dear God of the Onions, how can I thank you enough for watching over me and bringing me the greatest husband on earth? Last night he proved his undying love and devotion and presented me with a plate of five glorious, crispy, make-the-dog-drool, golden, baked, low-salt onion rings. Let me tell you, those were the best mother-bleeping morsels of food I have rested on my dying palette in what seems like decades.
To hell with the gastronomical side effects. Long live the onion. Give me onion or give me death. I am woman, hear my onions. Let them eat onions.
We shall call her Elizabeth Onion Piper.
We've packed our bags for D-Day. (We actually packed them back after the Thanksgiving scare, when we realized ANYTHING can happen at ANY TIME). After wearing hospital-supplied mesh-paper underpants for three days, I decided that a packed hospital bag was among the top priorities on our list of pre-baby "TO DOs"
WHAT I PACKED FOR ME:
*Ten pair of granny undies (I hear things get messy)
*toothpaste
*new toothbrush
*deodorant
*couple pairs of sweat pants & tent shirts
*fluffy fleecey bathrobe
*pajamas, a few
*girly supplies
*socks
*hairbrush
*back massager
*Mark's (of Mark's Pizzeria) phone number
WHAT I PACKED FOR ELIZABETH:
* ten going-home outfits (too many cute choices, I couldn't pick just ONE)
*Four blankets (it might be cold)
*five hats (to match the ten outfits)
*five pairs of itty bitty baby socks (to match the ten outfits)
*Baby suede snow suit (it's just the CUTEST thing!)
*diapers (soooo tiny!)
*car seat
WHAT I PACKED FOR BRIAN:
*$60 in quarters for phones/vending - just in case
* a list of 63 people to call once she is born
*New toothbrush
*deodorant
WHAT BRIAN PACKED:
*One pair boxer shorts
*Two Skydiving magazines
*One rock climbing magazine
*One WIRED magazine
*Cheese and crackers kits
*Peppermint patties
*kickin' MP3 tunes
So, I guess we're ready, right? I'll remind Brian to pick up some onions, THEN we'll be ready.
All hail the glorious onion.
Peace, till next